discernment is good!

I wish Spock were real so I could give him a high five! Logic is refreshing.
Many posts ago I vowed to make sure that I shall no longer be the pushover I once was. I should remind myself constantly about that. I've always placed a high value on helping others...maybe because it's fulfilling or it makes me feel good or for whatever reason (self-serving or otherwise). And---*hitting my head on the wall to the point of reaching a concussion*---I suppose I've advertised it too much? That it's my weakness? That I can be easily manipulated? Confuse me a little and I can be a handy-dandy assistant? It sucks. And it hurts. I am not a pawn. I am not some productive tool in the order of things. I have a minute proportion of self-esteem left and I would like to conserve it. And I can't believe this has happened to me over and over and over. Tsk. I really need improvement. Big time.

-------------------------->>> Meanwhile...

A few days ago, I requested for a prospectus from the London School of Tropical Medicine & Hygiene. A doctorate on vector biology (they have an insectary!). I received an e-mail informing me that I should expect it in two days. Let's see what happens next. If it works out, great...if it doesn't, at least I made a move.

Ack! I haven't practiced my Liszt piece! *screaming* I need to keep my head straight.