Perfectio omnium perfectionum

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Actus essendi (act of being) is the perfectio omnium perfectionum(perfection of all perfections). 

~ Thomas Aquinas

Since last Sunday, I entertained ideas about the contradiction in man's desire for the infinite despite a finite existence. The sermon I heard precipitated fireworks in my consciousness about the innate human awareness of forever, everlasting, hereafter...and the mathematical abstraction of infinity. Ad infinitum. I must agree with what was implied during the homily when father mentioned that it is the inescapable truth that our existence is finite that thus stirs our longing for the infinite. The forever and ever. 

Indeed, there is much that is beyond human understanding. 

the distinction of distinction

Waldmueller's "After School"

My husband's dinner time wisdom illuminated my somewhat dreary (on the average) disposition.  I'm usually (average of the average) cheerful (link to Exhibit A), but I suppose...imagine a high magnitude earthquake followed by a series of aftershocks. Or a stone thrown on a pond proceeded by ripples of water.  Or the opposite: a seemingly harmless stick that's patted on your arm in increasing frequency and intensity resulting to marred skin. Alright, that's enough of glamorized pain...

Wisdom. Husband. Right.
Our conversation was a mixture of daily events, achievements of our children, and my usual "what is your opinion about___" and "how do you interpret how I felt when___" and "what should I do/think about___."  What resonated with all that he had told me was to not immerse too much on thoughts about the future.  It was brilliant. Simple and brilliant.

On molding our children to be inclusive
I had suggested that perhaps we could educate our children about the difference between those who are vegetarian and those who are like us.  I thought that it would be a good exercise to emphasize that people differ in certain ways; perhaps through books or educational materials.  My husband didn't want to overemphasize that concept too much, because he didn't like the idea of teaching about "us" and "them." I thought, yes, it's "we." I like the thought. Expose but do not exaggerate.

On bracing myself for what is to come
On the subject of my verbal diarrhea concerning my thoughts, my husband (understandably exasperated) advised that I try to reduce the amount of thinking I allot for potential future scenarios. I had been introspecting about living in the present for years and I realized that I had deliberately bumped my head on an imaginary wall, developed amnesia, and stepped on the quicksand of "woe is my future." He also reminded me of my worth, because he thinks I undervalue myself.

"Adulting" and Self-Worth
We all, to a certain degree, have internal tussles about pride and humility.  Some people are overly proud and their entitlement levels are off the charts. Then there are those who consider themselves worthless and allow people to treat them like doormats.  Today's moral lesson is balance.  It can be a healthy practice to look in the mirror and have an imaginary conversation with the world by stating "I am valuable and I need to be convinced that you deserve me."  Or if you don't have time, just wink at yourself and say "You da man--Woman!"

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on awakenings, prudence, and vulnerability

Today is Canadian thanksgiving day and this long weekend was filled with memorable moments spent with family and extended families. Truly, there is much to be thankful for--and to share.

 I had been fixated on self-development and self-discovery for the past few days. After numerous inspirational videos and podcasts, I encountered this old Oprah episode:

 

My favorite statement from the video stated by Dr. Brene Brown, a social science researcher at the University of Houston, goes: "you share with people who earn the right to hear your story." I tend to be stingy about my stories--primarily because it's exhausting to recollect and share them with people. Also, I have to agree with Dr. Brown about being careful about what we share with people. But, it's a trial-and-error process isn't it? People aren't labeled with "10% share-worthy" or "half-and-half share-worthy." The episode above is a useful guideline, but based on experience what I find helpful is to give a sneak preview. Like a trailer. As time goes by, I become enlightened and realize that my stories are either being used as a stratagem to capitalize at my expense or become the basis for strengthening a connection.

 On a related note, when we are fully aware of our imperfections and accept them or improve when applicable (if it's a physical issue, then acceptance would be the best route), only then can we become compassionate with ourselves. When we are kind to ourselves, then we can be kind to other people. Our empathy can then be a magnet for fellow empathetic persons and the chances of getting a win-win situation when sharing our stories are high.

The ties that bind

 This post was prompted by a series of ordinary conversations both in person and through social media about loyalty. I hold persons who manifest honor, integrity, and (most of all) loyalty consistently in high regard--much like soldiers in battle. In this present day of heavy politicizing where there are "no permanent allies only permanent motives", it is a breath of fresh air to find people who have other people's backs. I venture to say that I aspire to possess the kind of honor, integrity, and loyalty that I hold in high esteem. And you might agree that this is a difficult and almost futile task especially when one's social environment reeks with deceit and hate. At least the movies continue to inspire us...

 

forebearance is a farce

Laughing at yours truly. Oh well. Erratic daftness levels. Imaginary horn blows in my ear to say "wake up!"